Well hello there daddy.
I’ll never punish my daughter for saying no.
The first time it comes out of her mouth, I’ll smile gleefully. As she repeats “No! No! No!” I’ll laugh, overjoyed. At a young age, she’ll have mastered a wonderful skill. A skill I’m still trying to learn. I know I’ll have to teach her that she has to eat her vegetables, and she has to take a nap. But “No” is not wrong. It is not disobedience.
1. She will know her feelings are valid.
2. She will know that when I no longer guide her, she still has a right to refuse.
The first time a boy pulls her hair after she says no, and the teacher tells her “boys will be boys,” we will go to her together, and explain that my daughter’s body is not a public amenity. That boy isn’t teasing her because he likes her, he is harassing her because it is allowed. I will not reinforce that opinion. If my son can understand that “no means no” so can everyone else’s.
3. She owes no one her silence, her time, or her cooperation.
The first time she tells a teacher, “No, that is wrong,” and proceeds to correct his public school, biased rhetoric, I’ll revel in the fact that she knows her history; that she knows our history. The first time she tells me “No” with the purpose and authority that each adult is entitled, I will stop. I will apologize. I will listen.
4. She is entitled to her feelings and her space. I, even a a parent, have no right to violate them.
5. No one has a right to violate them.
The first time my mother questions why I won’t make her kiss my great aunt at Christmas, I’ll explain that her space isn’t mine to control. That she gains nothing but self doubt when she is forced into unwanted affection. I’ll explain that “no” is a complete sentence. When the rest of my family questions why she is not made to wear a dress to our reunion dinner. I will explain that her expression is her own. It provides no growth to force her into unnecessary and unwanted situation.
6. She is entitled to her expression.
When my daughter leaves my home, and learns that the world is not as open, caring, and supportive as her mother, she will be prepared. She will know that she can return if she wishes, that the real world can wait. She will not want to. She will not need to. I will have prepared her, as much as I can, for a world that will try to push her down at every turn.
7. She is her own person. She is complete as she is.
I will never punish my daughter for saying no. I want “No” to be a familiar friend. I never want her to feel that she cannot say it. She will know how to call on “No” whenever it is needed, or wanted.
Lessons I Will Teach, Because the World Will Not — Y.S. (via poetryinspiredbyyou)
I love this.
Being mentally ill and being with someone who’s also mentally ill is great cuz its like sweet they get me and know I’m not faking. But then like, they also are mentally ill so your shit triggers their shit and then they are too fucked up to help you and it just becomes this vicious circle and it just totally sucks.
I love you.
“These men are window washers at a children’s hospital in Pittsburg. Some might think the job is menial, but to the kids who are horribly ill, looking out their window seeing their favorite superhero at their window makes all the pain go away for a bit. And that would make the job worthwhile.”
That’s awesome. I wonder if they got together with the idea or if it’s a company.
I can’t click my reblog button hard enough
It’s not just the ladies who get insecure, it’s all of us. It’s a human trait, yo.
Fricken’ beautiful. Everything that I want to say about this has been said in the post above me.
you can’t stop me from reblogging this over and over again
this makes me smile so much
don’t you hate it when money goes away when you spend it
Nana took too long getting his desert to his mouth…